HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
