Whod you bang
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Randomize
