I just saw a hot homeless man
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize