I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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