Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
