oh god the rape fog is back!
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
