There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
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