She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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