I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
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