I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
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I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
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THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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