Your mouth is God's brothel.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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