i permit you to call me
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
