I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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