yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
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He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
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I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
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