Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
