I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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