this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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