if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this must be what syphilis tastes like
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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