That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
