What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
