i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
did you just send me my own nude
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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