Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
40s are totally the cure
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
