I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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