Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
