so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
