do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
