he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize