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• (574): View more from Indiana

  Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.

  (260): View more from Indiana

  At least you didn't call me Brittany this time

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• (713): View more from Texas

  My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.

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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.

  Fav 3 1172 2772

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.

  Fav 8 2587 958

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  I just commented on the education level of his penis.

  Fav 2 994 896

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  I need a burrito and a hug.

  Fav 13 1613 809

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.

  Fav 12 833 1227

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary

  Fav 3 1203 637

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (760): View more from California

  Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Umm

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Exactly.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.

  Fav 2 429 541

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.

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• (420): View more from

  I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.

  Fav 1 446 247

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability

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