remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
She needs sedatives and a leash
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.