Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
