Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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