Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I just pynch a tree in the face
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize