I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
