If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
