apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
