nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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