god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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