Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
