I don't usually arrange sex via text message
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
