dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
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CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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