The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
