Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
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