im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
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All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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