im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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