is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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