I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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