Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
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