Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
