She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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