In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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