im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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