can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Randomize